Approximately two thousand and thirteen things I have learned:
-If you hate your job, leave it. If you can't leave right away, ask somebody you trust to hold you accountable to work towards leaving. Time wasted is time wasted. It's absolutely nothing else.
- If you order $40.00 worth of Indian food, it will last you for about 4 dinners. It will also make your bum a bit bigger. Could be a good or bad thing, depending on your aim.
-Anybody who waits around until the end of your time together to be honest with you, isn't worth feeling shitty over. Vulnerability is scary, but if you're gonna be in a scary place for another person they sure as hell better go there with you.
-A cat will always try to get an extra meal out of you. They are social parasites who know how to cry like infants (and as a childless woman, I will cave every single damn time).
-Your family will love you when you are at your best. They will also somehow find a way to love you when you are curled up in an anger ball, wishing the couch had a yuletide-free shield around it. Be kind.
-Stop typing that text. You're intoxicated and it's 3am.
-Throw your socks with holes in them in the garbage. What are you clinging so fiercely to, anyway?
-Stop wasting your money on 3D movies. They're not better. AVX, maybe. Fuck 3D everything.
-Take some time every day to make yourself aware of what's going on in the world outside of the city you live in. Rob Ford is not allowed to be your biggest historical takeaway from this year. The excuse that 'world news depresses you' is as shoddy as that toe-less sock.
-Tip people. Honestly. It's not about "karma", it's about recognizing that if you can afford to patronize the services of somebody making a very low wage, you should also be able to show that you appreciate the work they do. Tips help pay peoples' rent; they get their clothes washed; they matter.
-Every minute you spend reading crummy 'journalism' about somebody you'll never meet who has absolutely no affect on your progress as a human in any way whatsoever, will actually stunt your progress as a human. This one is tough because the junk we ingest with our eyes and minds is so much more delicious than the fantastic reality we could be cooking up for ourselves. I struggle with it daily.
-Never, ever take your good/medium/acceptable health for granted. Getting out of bed and walking to the bathroom in the middle of the night isn't as easy for everybody as it is for you. Stop pretending that you can subsist on cigarettes and vodka because your great-grandfather rocked it so well. We have science now, and your g-pa was just lucky.
-Don't let a list that somebody writes in an extremely little-known blog dictate or influence your decisions. Think for yourself, find whatever feels like it's missing, improve whatever feels like it's lacking. If you're happy with the balance you've struck, I raise my glass to you.
Chomps
